|
Serena Shares
[HTML]
Serena Shares Hi. My name is Serena. I am 14 years old and one of many in our system, though I am out a lot more than some of the others. It has taken us a long time to get to the point where we all communicate with each other, especially with our host, but finally we are able to acknowledge some of the awful stuff we had to go through. Though we are all part of one body we all have our own interests, likes, dislikes, and opinions. I love to write, and through my page I hope to be able to encourage others in systems like ours that they are not crazy, weird or alone. I am now a Christian – but I wasn't always. I still get scared, and sometimes feel like things will never get better, but now there is hope. Now I do know how much God loves me, and how much every one of us matters to the whole. I don't know what the Lord’s plans are for us, but I know now that being a multiple is not a curse or something to be ashamed of. It is a gift God has given us to help us survive circumstances that the devil tried to use to destroy us. But as the Word says, we are MORE than conquerors, and we will be whole happy, and a blessing to others. I will be updating my page and adding new stuff from time to time, as well as deleting some stuff, so please check back often. And remember - NEVER GIVE UP!
Love and blessing to all.
Serena
This is a dream I had, and I want it to be the first thing I share.
MY DREAM One night I dreamed that The Lord called for me to come visit with Him, because He had been watching me shed so many tears. Not to stay – just to visit with Him & be comforted, and He sent several angels to guide me up a long staircase to get to the Lord. They were in beautiful soft white gowns, and though I couldn't see their faces in the bright light they radiated, the peace that filled my spirit was overwhelming. We began up the stairs – I felt so safe, so protected, so full of anticipation of seeing my father at last. Every step filled me with more excitement, then suddenly there was a period of darkness ahead. I stopped dead in my tracks, trembling with fear, suddenly feeling the chill of the enemy’s taunts. But just as quickly as I felt that fear the angels spread their beautiful wings over me, reminding me that God will never leave me, even when I pass through the valley of darkness. They guided me safely past the dark place, and as I again entered the light, each step became like air – like I was merely gliding. But then I remembered. I remembered the shame, the pain I had endured, the awful things that had been done to me. And I remembered that I was not as others – I was not whole – I was one of many and there was no denying that. I felt embarrassed. I lowered my head in shame, and in that very instant I was standing at the foot of the throne of grace. The warmth and light was incredible but my own embarrassment wouldn't allow me to look into the eyes of the Lord. My tears began to fall, and as they did he took His hand and captured each one, and began to speak. "My precious child," He said, "there is no need to be ashamed or afraid in my presence. For I have not created you to live in shame, but to live in peace, filled with the joy of my spirit. Yes, you have been through trials and unbelievable traumas, but I saw it all, and I shed every tear alongside you. I didn't allow you to be created out of shame, but instead because I need you – to complete the work that I began in your system. Yes, you are one of many, and that is nothing to be embarrassed about. I allowed that – for as Satan tried to destroy you I was making certain that none of you were given more than you could handle. And even when you didn't feel my presence, I was there." At that moment He gently lifted my eyes to His, and the kindness that shone through penetrated my entire being. We ALL felt it deep inside, and He carefully picked me up and placed me in His lap. I saw our other parts being taken onto His lap as well, and I realized that He never ran out of room. Many came, and each felt comforted with the knowledge that they are all- WE are all – a special, and unique piece of the puzzle which is who we are. And without even one of us, the puzzle couldn't ever be complete. We all have jobs to do, and He has created each of us to fulfill a portion of His plan. Finally He wrapped His loving arms around each of us, bonding us together in a way we had never known before. And there was a peace that is unexplainable that flooded us all. Finally I understand about the "peace that passes all understanding." Before I knew it I was back in my bed, and when I woke up I realized my visit with the Lord had ended, but my time in His presence is everlasting. All of the shame, fear, embarrassment, and guilt I had felt about being a multiple and my past was washed away, and I know that no matter what, even when things seem overwhelming, I can call on Him, and there is always enough room for us all in "Daddy’s lap."
[/HTML]
|
